I'm an Idiot

...but then you knew that, didn't you. I got up and made it to my 8 a.m. tire appointment. Thought I'd shop a little while waiting. My daughter kept calling saying that the Gunnarman needed toys.

"He has ONE toy that I bought him at a yard sale," she lamented.

So I spent 45 minutes looking for something appropriate for the age and interests of my grandson that didn't cost more than the tires I was having mounted. Finally, I settled on a couple of chew toys, a stacker, and a little car that rumbles.

I checked out my three cases of Diet Coke, bananas, gum, and the toys and headed to McDonald's for a DC for the road. Just then daughter called again saying that Blake was zonked out on a mat at school. She had given him his sleeping medication instead of his other medicine before sending him off. She thought he'd be OK, but he was out like a light.

Gunnar was asleep, the cleaning ladies hadn't arrived, Blake's school is 45 minutes away and she had no one to help. Well, of course, Grandma Jo was stressing over this. Then Rick called. Then there were no lids for the drinks. Finally, I was headed toward the tire section when I realized I couldn't find the receipt for the groceries and toys. I stopped a clerk and asked her if they'd let me out without it.

"How did you lose it so quickly?" she asked.  Really? You asked that? If I knew that I would have that little paper in my hand now, wouldn't I. I had searched everywhere. Honest.

"Can they give me a duplicate?" I muttered.

"Oh, no, that's not possible."

So I wended my way to tires. Luckily they thought I looked honest, or pathetic, and let me out. Maybe it was because I'd already paid so much for those new tires that it offset anything I might have "stolen" by having no receipt.

I couldn't berate my daughter for being ditsy and giving Blake the wrong medicine. I couldn't even keep my receipt for 5 minutes. So I mailed the toys to Gunnar for twice the cost of the toys themselves. I don't keep boxes at my house. So sue me. And I didn't want to wait to get one. I waded into UPS, threw down the sack of stuff, and said, "Ship it! My grandson has no toys."

They're used to me at UPS. I'm in the system. They just punch me in and the daughter's address comes up. I'm sure there's notation also that reads, "This woman never has a box. She's an idiot. So soak her for as much as you can to ship her ridiculous contents. She'll pay whatever you ask cause she's pathetic."

Gunnar should have his really costly toys by Wednesday. Blake should be awake by then, too. I guess idiocy runs in our family. Sadly.