What is left after chaos is cleared? A void. I prayed for four and a half days that I'd remain strong and not hurt someone while the boys visited. They are so fun and so frustrating all at once. And now they are home and I am lonely. I know. I'm in a miasma. I'll be fine later, but for now--I feel as if someone socked me in the pit of my stomach.
I want my little ones to have happy starts to school and be joyous. I wish they lived in a less discombobulated household. Maybe all young families have wave after wave of crises, but I don't remember ours being that out of control when Rachel was little. I want my babies to have routine and order and peace. I don't think they get much of that.
Sigh! I need to pick up my meds at Sam's Club and take a double dose. Maybe I'll buy Mockingjay and see if it's better than I've heard. It's either that or eat a whole gallon of fudge revel ice cream. What to do? What to do? Maybe both...yes...
Friday, August 27, 2010
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August
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6 comments:
Hi JO!!!
hang in there, I cannot imagine living so far apart from my darling little baby grand!!!
I know as MOM'S and grandma's we want our childrens and grands lives to be so wonderful and perfect, they are little and they just go with the flow, they will understand how times can be tough when they are older, but for now if they are well loved, they are happy and secure.
YOU play an important role in their life and they love you so much!!!
Have a good day
hugs,
jamie
I keep hearing about Mockingjay. So intrigued. Not even sure what it is, but SOOO intrigued.
Jo - That is so sweet that you miss the little guys!
Don't read Mockingjay until you have read the first two or it won't make much sense. You will like them all though :-)
Have fun relaxing a bit!!
go for the icecream!!
Isn't that sort of like being a parent. You can't wait for them to move out when they are in their teens, then feel punched in the stomach when they leave! But I guess you have shown us that we get to do it all again with grandkids!
You're a good grandma!
Hugs Jo!!
You need to look into getting a Kindle! Books "on tap" are soooo nice! I hope you are feeling at peace again soon. Kids DO wear you out but bring such joy with them too. You're an awesome Grandma!!!!
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